Max is an ex-con who's been saving money to open a car wash in Pittsburgh. Lionel is a sailor who's returning home to the midwest to see the child born while he was at sea. They form an unlikely pair as the brawling Max learns a little how Lionel copes with the world: Lionel believes that the scarecrow doesn't scare birds, but instead amuses them - birds find scare-crows funny.

After a quick tour of San Francisco, Russ takes us on a nonstop tour of breasts in motion. Prominent strippers strut their stuff as they discuss their careers, bra sizes, and preferences in men.

Sally runs a mobile "pirate" radio station--which she operates from her van--where, in her sexy and sultry voice, she encourages her listeners (mostly teenagers) to use the music she plays "to ball by". She also takes calls from her listeners and even offers herself as a prize in a contest. Her show is so popular it winds up "turning on" large numbers of the local population. The authorities, of course, can't allow that to happen, so they send out the cops to find her and shut her down.

Herbie, the Volkswagen Beetle with a mind of its own, is racing in the Monte Carlo Rally. Unbeknownst to Herbie's driver, thieves have hidden a cache of stolen diamonds in Herbie's gas tank, and are now trying to get them back.

The priceless Blue Water sapphire is coveted by the heirs of Sir Hector Geste - his new wife, Flavia; his daughter, Isabel; and his adopted twin sons, heroic Beau and pathetic Digby. When Sir Hector takes to his deathbed (where he remains for the duration of the film), Beau absconds with the stone, to keep it from his stepmother. Flavia pursues him to North Africa, dispensing sexual favors to promote her schemes.

Alonzo Hawk is a mean-spirited property developer who has bought several blocks of land in the downtown district in order to build a gigantic shopping mall. There is one problem however; an elderly widow named Steinmetz won't sell the one remaining lot that Hawk needs to proceed with his scheme. So he resorts to all manner of chicanery, legal or otherwise, to get it. Fortunately, the widow Steinmetz has an ace up her sleeve in the form of Herbie, the miraculous Volkswagen.

A social misfit, Willard is made fun of by his co-workers, and squeezed out of the company started by his deceased father by his boss. His only friends are a couple of rats he raised at home, Ben and Socrates. (And their increasing number of friends) However, when one of them is killed at work, he goes on a rampage using his rats to attack those who have been tormenting him.

To save it from being put to death, Professor Albert Dooley takes home a dumb duck from the research laboratory, which accidentally was exposed to X-rays. At home he discovers that it lays now golden eggs. Since he's broke all the time, his family welcomes this new source of income greatly, and tries to keep it secret. But their greedy neighbors become suspicious.

In New England in the early 20th century, Pete is a nine-year-old orphan escaping from his brutal adoptive parents, the Gogans, with his only friend, a cartoon dragon named Elliott. Pete and Elliott successfully escape to Passamaquoddy, Maine, and live with Nora, a lighthouse keeper, and her father, Lampie. Elliott is sought for medicinal purposes by the corrupt Doctor Terminus.

Thomas Jerome Newton is a humanoid alien who comes to Earth to get water for his dying planet. He starts a high technology company to get the billions of dollars he needs to build a return spacecraft, and meets Mary-Lou, a girl who falls in love with him. He does not count on the greed and ruthlessness of business here on Earth, however.

Seymour is a young man who works in a flower store. He manages to create a carnivorous plant that feeds on human flesh. Nobody knows about it, so Seymour and the plant become good "friends". The plant needs food to grow up, so it convinces him to start killing people.

A Mexican revolutionary hires an American gunslinger to organize the rescue of their leader from a brutal army prison.

An artist has an opportunity to go to Paris and wants to bring his fiancee along. However, she's a psychiatrist who currently has three female patients who don't like men. So, he guises himself as three different men to gauge their trust and hopefully cure them so that his fiancee can go with him.

George Lester is a man who is chasing rainbows, looking for the pot of gold at the end. When his wife, Pamela grows tired of being dragged all over the world, she leaves him. While she is away, George converts her family home into a discotheque, when she returns, she threatens to send George to jail for fraud, cause she didn't give her approval. George needing some fast bucks, decides to turn to an old cohort of his, William Homer but Willy's a little short. George then decides to steal the plans to a new drill, Pamela's suitor, Dudley Heath is working on. But when George gets the mumps, he can't make it to the meeting place and refuses to give Willy the plans unless he gives him the cash first. And the buyers won't give unless they see the merchandise first.

Some college students manage to persuade the town's big businessman, A. J. Arno, to donate a computer to their college. When the problem- student, Dexter Riley, tries to fix the computer, he gets an electric shock and his brain turns to a computer; now he remembers everything he reads. Unfortunately, he also remembers information which was in the computer's memory, like the illegal business Arno is involved in.

The musical revolves around the antics of Mame Dennis, a fun-loving, wealthy eccentric with a flare for life and a razor sharp wit. Her life is suddenly changed when she becomes the guardian of her late brother's only child, Patrick Dennis. Her adventures take us from the speak-easies of the roaring 20's to the depression following the great Stock Market crash. She is rescued by a wealthy Southern plantation owner, marries and is widowed suddenly, and through it all, manages to keep things under control. With some help from her dearest friend, Vera Charles, she helps keep things at 3 Beekman Place a rousing free-for-all.

Barbara is a very rich girl who falls in love with Norman Phiffier, a poor young man. She doesn't tell him who she really is and prepares to marry him. But, Mrs. Tuttle (Barbara's mother) doesn't want her daughter to mary such a poor man. So, she hires Norman at one of her big stores, and gives him the most difficult and disgusting works. She hopes that seeing Norman humiliated, Barbara will finally leave him. But things don't work exactly this way...

Scientists mount an expedition to find a Bigfoot-type creature.

Joey Drayton brings her fiancé, Dr. John Prentice, home to sunny San Francisco to meet her affluent parents. Their liberal persuasions are now put to the test, for although the young man is an ideal choice (he's highly and internationally respected in the medical field, and he's impeccably mannered, handsome, well dressed and of a respectable California family), he's black. The film, which covers one busy day in the Drayton home, is essentially a drawing-room comedy, a series of cross-conversations between the young doctor and the girl's parents, and finally between all sets of parents and offspring. A simple dinner is extended to include the doctor's parents, who fly up from Los Angeles for the evening, and the crusty but benevolent old Irish priest, a friend of the family. Thus, the title of the film . . .

Gloria is a young woman of the Depression. She has aged beyond her years and feels her life is hopeless, having been cheated and betrayed many times in her past. While recovering from a suicide attempt, she gets the idea from a movie magazine to head for Hollywood to make it as an actress. Robert is a desperate Hollywood citizen trying to become a director, never doubting that he'll make it. Robert and Gloria meet and decide to enter a dance marathon, one of the crazes of the thirties. The grueling dancing takes its toll on Gloria's already weakened spirit, and she tells Robert that she'd be better off dead, that her life is hopeless - all the while acting cruelly and bitterly, alienating those around her, trying to convince him to shoot her and put her out of her misery. After all, they shoot horses, don't they?

An animated feature which begins, ends and occasionally combines with, live-action filmed on location. A white dropout struggles to create comics and animated films, drawing inspiration from the harsh, gritty world around him. Still sharing his run-down apartment with his middle-aged parents, an oafish slob of an Italian father and a ditzy nut-case of a Jewish mother, he is ridiculed and looked down upon by his friends, hypocrites who run with violent gangs and the Italian Mafia, and a shallow Black girl who makes her living downtown with the pimps and pushers. This cartoonist gets a chance to pitch a film idea to a movie mogul, but the story proves too outrageous: a far-future Earth, destroyed by war and pollution, where a mutant antihero challenges and kills God. Complications ensue when the cartoonist's parents react in irrational ways to his various involvements.

Two would-be safe-crackers 'sort of' kidnap the two grandchildren of millionaire J. W. Osborne. In a story somewhat reminiscent of O. Henry's The Ransom of Red Chief, the ransom amount keeps getting smaller as the two children have the best vacation from boarding school ever with their two new friends.

A persiflage on the protest movements of the 60s. Its hero is the bold and sex-obsessed tom-cat Fritz the Cat, as created by the legendary underground artist Robert Crumb. Quitting university Fritz the Cat wanders through the hash, Black Panther and Hell's Angels scenes to find to himself.

Meek and mild mannered bookkeeper Henry Limpet has few passions in life. It's mid-1941 and he would love to join the Navy but has been rated 4F. His friend George Stickle is in the Navy and lays it on pretty thick. If Henry could have one thing it would be to become a fish. While on a visit to Coney Island, Henry falls into the water and miraculously gets his wish. Now a fish, he makes friends, Ladyfish and Crabby the hermit crab and loves his new life. He also uses his abilities to help the US Navy locate and sink Nazi U-Boats, forcing the Germans to create a new weapon to deal with the Allies secret weapon. When years later the Navy finds intelligent activity among dolphins, they may also know who is teaching them.

A journalist researching a documentary in the Sahara Desert meets a gunrunner who dies suddenly. When the journalist notices that they have a similar appearance, he assumes the recently deceased's identity and accepts the consequences that it brings.

In order to write an expose on how cheerleading demeans women, a reporter for a college newspaper infiltrates the cheerleading squad.

A fictional account of the real life, eleven day, never explained 1926 disappearance of famed murder mystery writer is presented. On a cold winter day, her damaged car with her expensive fur coat is found abandoned at the side of a country road. While the authorities initially suspect that she could have committed suicide, her pompous husband, Col. Archibald Christie, who is less than cooperative with the authorities, is adamant that she is still alive. What he doesn't tell them is that he recently asked her for a divorce so that he could marry his secretary, Miss Nancy Neele. Although the divorce request was not a total surprise since she knew of the extramarital affair, Mrs. Christie still did not want to grant him the request since she still loves him. Concurrently, American newspaper columnist Wally Stanton was scheduled to conduct an interview with Mrs. Christie...

When her husband dies en route to America, Martha Price and her daughter Hilary are left to carry out his dream: the introduction of Hereford cattle into the American West. They enlist Sam "Bulldog" Burnett in their efforts to transport their lone bull, a Hereford named Vindicator, to a breeder in Texas, but the trail is fraught with danger and even Burnett doubts the survival potential of this "rare breed" of cattle.

A number of leading Western scientists have been kidnapped only to reappear a fews days later. Unfortunately, each scientist has been brainwashed and is now completely useless. The British send their agent, Harry Palmer, to investigate. Palmer is surprised to be selected for such a mission (considering his past) and believes he has been chosen because he is expendable.

Some fishermen are attacked in the Louisiana swamps. When the word gets out of a mysterious Bigfoot-type creature, two researchers come to a small town to study and hopefully discover what the beast is. Their research from some farmers help the two men to learn that the creature may be a very angry and murderous missing link.

John Baxter is a freewheeling trader of goods in Africa with a pet chimp and one dream: to save enough money to buy his dream gas station in Detroit. Madeleine Cooper is the lady of mystery he runs into as she flees from big game hunter Jack Palance.

Horror movie actor Paul Toombes, famous for playing "Dr. Death," suffers a nervous breakdown before going to England to do a TV series. Cast and crew members start dying the way characters did in Toombes' old movies.

Aspiring filmmakers Mel Funn, Marty Eggs and Dom Bell go to a financially troubled studio with an idea for a silent movie. In an effort to make the movie more marketable, they attempt to recruit a number of big name stars to appear, while the studio's creditors attempt to thwart them. The film contains only one word of dialogue, spoken by an unlikely source.

Loosely based on H.P. Lovecraft's novel THE CASE OF CHARLES DEXTER WARD, this fright flick opens with a warlock placing a curse on a group of villagers about to burn him at the stake. Generations later, the warlock's descendant returns to the village to pick up where his ancestor left off.

A scientist living in an apartment complex kills a girl and uses acid to destroy her internal organs, and then kills himself. While investigating, a doctor discovers that the scientist was doing experiments on the use of genetically engineered parasites as organ transplants. Soon, other people in the complex begin showing signs of carrying the parasites, spreading the things through wanton orgiastic abandon, and the complex begins suffering an attrition problem.

Rose is involved in a motorcycle accident, and has experimental surgery performed in order to save her life. However, she develops a taste for blood. Her victims grow in number as well as madness, turning the city into chaos.

While on a fishing trip, Harry Baldwin (Ray Milland) and his family hear an explosion and realize that Los Angeles has been leveled by a nuclear attack. Looters and killers are everywhere. Escaping to the hills with his family, he sets about the business of surviving in a world where, he knows, the old ideals of humanity will be first casualties. Not one to give up, he holds up a store for supplies and hides the family in a cave.

Henry Dussard, a young American, inherits a picturesque but badly neglected olive farm in southern France and is determined to make it operational again despite cautionary advice from the local priest and a pretty villager. Desperate for laborers, the inventive Dussard turns to the zaniest crew of olive pickers ever recruited - four mischievous monkeys! As former members of an Air Force space team, these intelligent chimps quickly pick up on their new responsibilities - but prove to have a turbulent effect on the local townspeople.

Quiet young Orfamay Quest from Kansas has hired private detective Philip Marlowe to find her brother. After two leads turn up with ice picks stuck in them, he discovers blackmail photos concerning TV star Mavis Wald. She rejects Marlowe's help, and this is forcibly underlined by her gangster boyfriend. So, wonders Marlowe, is there a link between Orfamay and Mavis?

Vince Lombardi High School keeps losing principals to nervous breakdowns because of the students' love of rock 'n' roll and their disregard of education. The putative leader of the students is Riff Randell, who loves the music of the Ramones. A new principal, the rock-music-hating Miss Evelyn Togar, is brought in and promises to put an end to the music craze. When Miss Togar and a group of parents attempt to burn a pile of rock records, the students take over the high school, joined by the Ramones, who are made honorary students. When the police are summoned and demand that the students evacuate the building, they do so, which leads to an explosive finale.

A biological weapon gone awry is only the start of problems in the little town of Evan's City, Pennsylvania. Bouts of insanity in the populace are leading to murder and rioting, until the US Army turns up - and things really start going to hell.

Dark satire in which the token black man on the executive board of an advertising firm is accidentally put in charge. Renaming the business "Truth and Soul, Inc.", he replaces the tight regime of monied white ad men with his militant brothers. Soon afterwards, however, the power that comes with its position takes its toll on Putney...

Snake-Crane Secret is a tale of deceit, lying and mistrust. A family tries to uphold their honor, while keeping their Sacred Kung-Fu book from getting into the wrong hands.

Several criminals use safe deposit boxes in a German bank to store large amounts of illicit cash. An employee of the bank learns who they are by means of a prostitute they all patronize, and devises a clever plan with her to steal the money. Now the criminals can't go to the police, but they can try to steal the money back...

A thief (Duke Anderson) just released from ten years in jail, takes up with his old girlfriend (Ingrid) in her posh apartment. He makes plans to rob the entire building. What he doesn't know is that his every move is recorded on audio and video tape, although he is not the subject of any surveillance.

Candid Camera's Allen Funt secretely tapes people's reactions to unexpected encounters with nudity in unusual situations, such as when a naked young woman casually exits an elevator in an office building, or when the nude male art model breaks the wall between artist and model and has off-the-cuff conversations with the clothed women artists. Funt also secretly tapes the test audience watching the preview film and their responses to it, from outright indignation to warm hearted-praise.

A shy teenager accidentally kills a mocking peer, and his mother helps him hide in a spare room in their house. Problems arise when the mother goes for an operation and dies, and the house is sold to a new family, with the teen still living inside.